I'll Keep This Safe Here

by Bottom of the Lake

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released July 26, 2018

recorded, mixed, mastered, and produced by Jeff Leber at Prairie State Records
album art by Dickri Aduriz


all rights reserved



Bottom of the Lake Oshkosh, Wisconsin

Oshkosh, WI

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Track Name: Indian Ridge
I can't hold them back anymore
I'm an army of one fighting in this war
They're smashing the windows, they're breaking down my door,
and I can't hold them back anymore

I'm screaming but there's not a sound
I'm begging for help when there's no one around
The clock just ticks on, and my time's running out,
and I'm screaming but there's not a sound

They're smashing the windows, they're breaking down my door,
and I can't hold them back anymore
The clock just ticks on, and my time's running out,
and I'm screaming but there's not a sound
Track Name: (Not) Alone
Am I awake or am I sleeping?
'Cause lately, they've felt the same
Persistent demons trailing and I think they know my name
And they look a lot like me

And in the dead of night, it's hard not to hear a sound
And in the absence of light, it's hard to feel like there's no one else around

In a crowd of people, I still feel so alone
And while surrounded by warmth, I remain freezing cold
There's no coming back from where I've ended up
There's only learning to be comfortable

I'm scared 'cause I feel myself start to slip again
As I try my best to keep my grip
But I know I lack the strength to fight through the darkest days
And I'm afraid they're gonna win

I walk alone through the cold and falling snow
Two sets of footprints everywhere I go
I can't begin to describe the feeling I have inside
I'm so alone but it never leaves my side
Track Name: Something // Anything
I'm standing on the shoreline just watching the water
And I can see the body slowly changing from a ripple to a wave
The calm before the storm and I know what's coming
But I still stay

So pull me down deeper
Grab my ankles and stop me from surfacing
Let the water fill my lungs
I don't care, I wanna feel something

The clouds begin to combine, the sky's getting darker
And I can hear the wind begin to whistle through the trees that start to shake
The calm before the storm and I know what's coming
But I still stay

So make me believe you
Do your best to try to stop me from leaving
Let your lies fill my head
I don't care, I don't feel anything

My mouth's wide open
I'm breathing in the water
I give in to the ocean
And sink back into your arms
Track Name: 429
Your mind is not your own, it belongs to the devil within
He has all control, you're just a puppet on a string
You don't pick the path you walk, you just follow the one that's been chosen for you
Everything around you has been decided by someone other than you

You don't own your flesh, it's merely a rented hotel room
You're only just a guest whose frame rots inside of its tomb
Your bones, they itch underneath your skin, just trying to get out
And your eyes, they beg for help, but your mouth doesn't make a sound

Your eyes, they beg for help
But your mouth doesn't make a sound
And I'm sorry that I couldn't help you
I'm sorry that I wasn't there
Track Name: Marcus
"We're just all creatures of habit"
That's what you said to me
And if by chance that's true, it would explain a lot about my mindset
It's been so long since I've seen your face, sometimes I wonder just who you are now
For the longest time, thought I was right
But now I'm thinking that I was wrong

I still can't stop thinking about you, I want you to meet me behind the hospital
Get in my passenger seat and we can cruise, and listen to 'Wilder Mind'
We'll get lost on country roads as I try to forget about the mistakes that I've made

And you can just fuck with my heart like you always do
You can just take it or leave it like you always seem to
You've always had me, but when you decide that you want me, I promise I won't be there anymore

I really don't blame you
I wish I could've been better for you
And I don't want to keep believing that I'm the reason for whatever things you can't do

I think of where I've been and I dwell on the past, feeding the hidden pain that's still inside
I can't help but wonder just where I will end up next, and if it will last, and if I will be alright
'Cause if there's one thing that I've learned it's that nothing's forever, the best things in life are just scattered
Everything passes with the wind and weather, never to come back, never to be felt again

It was just a matter of time
A state of condition and hearts
And now I'm in a different state
Wishing that we could restart
Track Name: Weathered
I sit like an instrument
Becoming weathered and bent out of tune
And my head is getting tired of wondering
Just how the hell I got lost inside of you

This town is so god damn small
And yet I can't seem to find my way out

All these roads, they lead me to you
And all these thoughts are wasted on you
It doesn't matter how far you run from it
Clear your mind as many times as you'd like, but your first love will always dwell in it

Not so much pushing you to the back of my mind
As much as trying to rid you of my life
And more so learning to live with this
Along with everything else in time

I'll keep this safe here
Inside my head, and inside my heart
Accepting that I cannot escape it
And knowing that it will never depart
Track Name: 416
I can't see your face anymore
Your voice no longer rings in my ears
It seems I can't recall a thing
Not a single memory remains

Sometimes it feels like you were never here
And you never walked the same ground that I do
But I know that you existed before
'Cause our mother has cried for you

The pain, it eats away
And the darkness, it devours
A day feels like a year
And a minute, like an hour

What were your last moments like?
Were you scared? Did you cry?
What was inside of your head?
Were you ready to die?

Forever my brother

Life is too precious
And death is too real
Track Name: Golden Eagles
It's been a while since the hedges have been trimmed
And the branches are hanging low
The floor's beginning to collect dust now
And everything you must not care for anymore

As the cancer eats away
And your memory, it fades
You begin to turn more gray
Accepting, and waiting for the day

The time you spent, it's not all for nothing
And the way she went is the way that you'll go
Together in life, separated by a sudden death
You're breaking from the light and slipping deep into the darkness

The monster in you will not cease
You're taken over by disease
With hope beginning to decrease
Questioning, and begging for relief

A living room, once warm and bright
Floor painted with a low sunlight
Has now become so cold and dark with the blinds always drawn
And I can see you start to slip
Forgetting things and losing grip
I'm afraid I'll end up the same way when I age and turn to stone

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